Valuing Your Own Voice

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I hear stories all day long. Sad stories, funny stories, unbelievable stories, and stories of courage. People tell me things that they don’t tell anyone else in the world, and while this sometimes can feel overwhelming, it’s more often an honor and privilege.

Within these stories are themes of love, loss, success, ambivalence and fear. I help people connect the dots of their lives by listening and watching closely for anything that will help me piece together the puzzle of who they are, and where they want to be. Sometimes these themes are so buried under layers of defense and false beliefs that I have to peel away the compacted piles of conditioning to get to the truth of that story.

Very often when clients come into their sessions they start by telling me they have nothing prepared or to say. When I hear this I think about the power of story. Maybe some of us don’t feel that we have something valuable to say, or even worse that we’re not worthy of being heard.

Questioning the value of your voice or story is one of the most dangerous perceptions you could have.

It’s understandable that some stories are very hard to tell. The one’s that involve abuse, shame, loss and failure can feel impossible to speak about. These kinds of stories should only be shared when it’s appropriate and safe, but they need to be told nonetheless. The everyday chapters of our lives may seem ordinary and banal, but you would be surprised to learn how much power even the most mundane story can have. It really comes down to finding the courage and confidence to share your inner world because this is where change really happens.

Andra Brosh, Ph.D., BCHN